GHANA’S TOP TEN FOR 2010

Ebenezer, this is how far the lord has brought the Coast Of Gold.  If we have nothing to be grateful about, at least we should thank God that he did not give us mad men in the region of Gbagbo to deal with.  The year 2010 has been a very eventful one for us as a country and I can not let it go just like that without a salute and a cursory retrospection.   Some captivating persons, events and institutions deserved mentioning, for the wondrous services they gave our motherland this year.

  1. MOST PATRIOTIC CITIZEN – Crusading Guide’s Anas Aremeyaw Anas is arguably my most patriotic citizen.  If anyone should be given a national award this year, it should be this industrious gentleman who has taken it upon his shoulders to expose the very enemies of the state.  He has decided to sacrifice his freedom and hide his identity just to make sure the country doesn’t give room to the grooming of more Gbagbos. The Cocoa bribery scandal and the gory Osu Children’s home revelation are there for all to see.   Instead of giving national awards to people who end up impregnating 16year old girls they teach, it should be reserved for people of his kind.
  2. WORST MOMENT-  I believe we would all agree that the worst moment for this country was when a certain kleptomaniac called Suarez decided to turn football into handball.  Our own Baby Jet climaxed it when he flew that God-given ball over the gaping net.  Whatever it is, he gave us something to dance about.  Suarez and Asamoah Gyan combined to send the whole country into mourning that fateful evening.
  3. DISSING OF THE YEAR.   – you might not agree with me but I think Deputy minister of  Tourism, Koby Acheampong’s referral to NPP General Secretary as ‘kokoase kuraseni’  stands tall.   This is too serious an insult to come from a deputy minister.  Where did he learn that from?  Is it Prempeh College or KATANGA?  But did that insult fit the man famously called ‘Sir John’.  At times, I am forced to believe that Kobby knows Sir John very well.  Before he left for Accra to take up his new position, I have had cause to wonder which school he attended.
  4. WORST SERVICE PROVIDER. – HMMNN!!  Is it MTN or ECG?  Choosing between these two is like choosing between Charles Taylor and Idi Amin.  I wonder if the CEOs of these companies are really proud of their positions and the services they offer.   So don’t they feel ashamed when they do adverts and pride themselves as multinational companies?  A telecommunication company whose customer service line cannot be reached is far worse than a scam company.  With ECG, lights go off as if the CEO and his son keep playing ‘Mario’ game with the switch.  I think we must all adopt the strategy of the man who went to dump rotten food in front of their office.  It is sad that police are going about arresting people for fraud and they have never invited the owners and operators of both ECG and MTN. Does SCANcom and SCAMcom tell us anything about MTN?
  5. MOST ARROGANT – Is it the so-called presidential staffer, Stan Dogbe or Ursula Owusu of NPP fame?  With no prejudice against anyone, this two people have exhibited much more arrogance than any other person.  I am surprised that Uncle Atta still has someone like Stan Dogbe under his watch and in his office.  This is absolutely a contradiction of his principles of humility.  As for Ursula Owusu, I cant wait to witness her first fist-to-fist fight when she is lucky enough to get to parliament.  Ghana would have to get a speaker of parliament in the person of the late Ala Adjetey to handle such a fire-breathing woman.  The truth is we can all be confident and express ourselves freely without necessarily been arrogant.
  6. DISCOVERY OF THE YEAR.  – This is yet another difficult path.  Is it Funny Face of chorkor Trotro fame or Dede Ayew of Black Stars fame?  Dede Ayew was awesome during the year in footballing circles.  He brought smile and confidence to the whole nation.  Though his contribution was not acknowledged by CAF, who would ever be surprised to hear that Ataa Ayi has stolen money?  CAF as we know is a very confused body.  As the world cup fever died down and other things took over, Funny Face appeared from nowhere and started ripping people’s rib apart.  His funny face is all over TV nowadays and he’s got his swag on.
  7. UNINTELLIGENT STATEMENT OF THE YEAR– when Richard Quashigah, who is so full of propaganda, was asked where he will place former president Kufour in the presidential ratings, he emphatically said fourth (4th).  When pushed further to name the first three, he put Dr. Nkrumah first, followed by Jerry Rawlings.  However, when asked about who he will put in the third postion, he kept mute for sometime and said ‘PRESIDENT MILLS HAS NOT FINISHED HIS TERM OF OFFICE YET’.   Who will he rate as third best president, and he was fumbling.  So why put Kufour in the 4th position when you know you have no one to put in 3rd position.   Running close to Richard Quashigah’s statement is one made by former minister of information Asamoah Boateng.  He told Joy Fm that BNI officials were ‘TRAMPLING’ ON HIS CHILDREN.  HMMMNN!! Only in Ghana.
  8. MOST POPULAR WORD– this word has been on the lips of almost every Ghanaian throughout the year.  When the president wakes up in the morning, that is the first thing he says.  When you switch on your radio or TV set, that is the first word you hear.   It has become the most popular word even on our pulpits.    The only people who have not really used this word are those in Osu cemetery.   OIL, OIL, OIL.
  9. POPULAR PHRASE OF THE YEAR – ‘CAUSING FEAR AND PANIC’.  If you even cough now, you might be charged for causing fear and panic.   Thieves are no longer charged for stealing.  They are charged for causing fear and panic.  I was nearly charged for causing fear and panic when I helped organised the first ever KATANGA FESTIVAL.   I even fear being charged for causing fear and panic by the writing of this article.
  10. GHANA’S WORST ENEMY OF THE YEAR–   hmmmnn!  SUAREZ OR ISSA HAYATOU?   Maybe, we might add Coach Milo to the list.  Suarez denied us a maiden Semi-final berth at the world cup, Issa Hayatou and his comrades shamelessly denied Asamoag Gyan and Dede Ayew, well deserved awards.  Milo was more like an unfaithful girlfriend, who after been sponsored through her education, opens her stinking mouth to tell her sponsor that she can’t marry her because he is not her class.  As for Suarez, I will personally convince him to pay a visit to Ghana.

The world cup brought excitement to the country and the continent alike.  The flow and smell of oil has brought hope to us all. It is my prayer that in the years ahead God will shower his blessing on us.  I pray that the angel of death that is carrying Gbagbo’s warrant letter should hurry up.  Do I hear some peace loving people shout a big AMEN to that?   God bless our homeland Ghana.  Adios

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